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There is nothing left inside of me,
only emptiness and pain.
My heart is cold and lonely,
like a hanging leaf, in the rain.
There is an Iron wall around my heart,
I cannot reach my soul,
I try to find my feelings there,
but I only reach this wall.
Oh where is truth? Reality? Joy, or hope?
Where are life and freedom?
Do they really exist, apart from in thought?
Or is everything pointless? Is it all for naught?
I want so much to believe,
but...
I try each day to pray to God,
in my mind a cry to the heavens,
but all I hear in return are my doubts,
and the mocking laugh of the demons.
My heart is locked away from me,
and with it all love and compassion.
I begin now to doubt it even was there,
that I ever once felt a true passion.
Oh why God, why are you so distant from here?
Why can't I reach you? Why can't I hear?
Why is my heart locked away from me?
I want so much to love you Lord,
but...
My heart is silent. I am all alone. There is nothing
to share. Nothing. No-one. Cold.
-- Daniel Fairhead (2003)
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